Unfortunately, I can’t snark about specimens today; for some reason, none of the documents pages have been loading for me for the last few days! I’ve even tried using my VPN to make the USPTO think I’m in the USA, but still no luck. 641 new marks this week, 342 cancellations, and an unlimited amount of frustration about these non-loading pages!
(Some of these are legitimate brand names! I’ve included them on this list because those brand names are also words or phrases that may be used on the goods in question by crafters and makers.)
PART 1: NEW REGISTRATIONS
AMONG US – But you weren’t using this anyway, right?
BET ON WOMEN
BROWN N PROUD
CEASE & DESIST – It’s what I wish frivolous trademark registrants would do!
CRYPTO IS KING – This has an incredibly long list of goods.
CRYPTO IS QUEEN – Same owner, same goods list.
DEATH & TAXES – The only trademark guaranteed in life.
DIVINE ARMY – As a non-religious person, it’s weird how religion often seems to be about making war?
FUN ON WEEKDAYS – Kind of the opposite of hustle culture.
GIRL GAINS – Always a joy to add to the “says girl, but they mean full-grown woman” section. [eyeroll]
IT NO MATTER! – Can’t see the specimen; feels like a quote from a meme or viral video?
JESUSITIS – Also as a non-religious person, I don’t get why you’d make your religion sound like a disease?
KISS ME AT MIDNIGHT – Also covers drinkware, so watch out with your New Year’s Eve designs!
LMAOWTF – IYKYK.
MAVS – Owned by the Dallas basketball folks.
NOT BAD FOR A HUMAN – Funny, this went on the spreadsheet right underneath NOSTROMO!
OBI-WAN KENOBI – But you REALLY weren’t using this already, right?
PEACE AND GO FUCK YOURSELF – A bit of a mixed message.
PROUD PECKER – ARRGGGHHH, why won’t it let me see specimens???
QUEEN OF CLUBS – Finally, a golf pun that makes sense!
THINK. DECIDE. DO. – So, basically … the way we all exist. Every day.
UNTITLED GOOSE GAME – If you haven’t played this yet, DO IT!!
VAIN – I bet you think this trademark is about you.
WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM
WIFED UP – Not sure if the bride or groom wears this.
PART 2: CANCELLED MARKS
(Standard disclaimer: Always double-check these words and phrases before using them in your designs, to make sure there isn’t a separate registration that is still live and active. Some marks have multiple registrations!)
DRINK COFFEE PUT ON SOME GANGSTER RAP AND HANDLE IT
FULL OF AWESOMESAUCE
HE WHO SHEDS BLOOD WITH ME SHALL FOREVER BE MY BROTHER
I WORKOUT BECAUSE PUNCHING PEOPLE IS FROWNED UPON
IT’S A VERB
LEGENDS ARE BORN * [removed from spreadsheet]
LIVE LIFE MAKE WAVES
MAYBE, JUST MAYBE…
MIMOSAS MADE ME DO IT * [removed from spreadsheet]
PEACE AND ADVENTURE COMES FROM WITHIN
PROUD TO LEAD LIKE A GIRL * [removed from spreadsheet]
RED BLOODED AMERICAN
REDEFINE YOUR LIMITS
RESPECT YOUR MOTHER
THE TALLEST MAN ON EARTH
TONE IT UP
TRAIN LIKE A FIGHTER * [removed from spreadsheet]
PART 1-B: SPECIMENS OF NOTE
BAH! Not being able to see the specimens is really cramping my style. I want to be a jerk about them!!
Note: This is a curated list, and may not include all marks that affect you or your business. All opinions expressed in the snark are my own.
As always, the new marks have been added to my ginormous spreadsheet; please check it out for a shockingly large list of registered trademarks!