It’s a mild week; only 559 newly registered marks, and 336 cancellations. But a couple of those cancellations are juicy ones that have been on the spreadsheet forever!!
(Some of these are legitimate brand names! I’ve included them on this list because those brand names are also words or phrases that may be used on the goods in question by crafters and makers.)
PART 1: NEW REGISTRATIONS
BACK 2 SCHOOL SPECIAL
BARBELLS AND BEEF – Right near BARBECUE AND BURPEES on the spreadsheet. I guess exercise and meat-eating go hand in hand?
BE FREE, BE FIT, BE YOU
BELLY LAUGHS – It’s a comedy club. And in other news, they’re still making new comedy clubs! Seems like such an ’80s-’90s thing.
BLACK PROSPERITY MATTERS
BLUE COLLAR FIREMEN – Today I learned that firemen and police officers are considered “blue collar” workers!
COCONUTS & PAPAYAS
DEAR MAMA Goods: “Infant wearable blankets”
DEUX ROUES – French for “two wheels”
EAT PLANTS B*TCH – Owned by “Slutty Vegan, Inc.”, and I have complaints about their specimen below!
EVIL – Ugh, I hate adding things this common to the one-word list.
FRESH MINERAL WATER
GIANT FRICKEN LASER KITTIES – Appears to be the name of a Steve Aoki music show that happened in 2022.
GOOD DEVIL – (checks TESS) Hey, BAD ANGEL is still available! (Though BADASS ANGEL is registered.)
HOSTILE HIPPIE – I think these days we’re calling them Boomers. 😆
HUSTLE STRONG – Or, y’know, don’t hustle so much. Enjoy your life.
INNER PEACE OUTER GLOW
INVASIVE SPECIES – Seems pretty apt for a shirt worn by a human.
IT’S .357 SOMEWHERE – A gun phrase, owned by someone in Arizona? What a surprise! (I gotta get out of this state.)
JUST BLUNT – Why do so many marijuana graphics involve aliens?
KYLE – Sorry, guys named Kyle; you can no longer put your name on (checks list) G-strings and thong underwear.
LAW ABIDING CRIMINAL
LET’S GET REAL
MOTHERHOOD IS A RELATIONSHIP, NOT A ROLE
MYHOBBY – I had to look up what a chausible is, from the list of goods! (If you haven’t already guessed, I am not a religious person.)
NOODLERS – Someone has named a sports team after slang for “just dicking around.”
OLD LADY GANG – It’s a restaurant! And looks fairly delicious.
ONE EYE KINGS – The King of Diamonds is traditionally the only “one eyed” king, since he’s drawn in profile.
PLACES OF INTEREST
PREMIUM CRAP – OMG, this is possibly the longest list of goods in a single category I have ever seen.
REEL ALOHA – Fishing phrases might be taking over the “most nonsensical” title from golf phrases!
SASQUATCH SAP – Can you make … sasquatch syrup from that sap?
SAY YES TO WHAT’S NEXT – Unless what’s next is dangerous or gross, of course.
SOMETHIN OUT OF NOTHIN
STAY LOW & KEEP FIRING – Gun phrase? If it isn’t an Arizona owner, it’s a Florida owner.
SUGAR AND SPICE AND EQUAL RIGHTS
SUPPLIES INTENSE REACTIONS – I love this concept. Let people know about you on your shirt.
UNBOTHERED & THRIVING – Kind of amazed this is the first “unbothered” mark on the spreadsheet!
UPPERCASE – Thank goodness the specimens have this all in uppercase, or I’d have to throw down.
VODKA SUCKS [Supplemental] – Hard agree. “Flavorless” spirit, my ass.
YOU’RE ON MUTE
PART 1-B: OLDER REGISTERED MARKS I DISCOVERED THIS WEEK
PART 2: CANCELLED MARKS
(Standard disclaimer: Always double-check these words and phrases before using them in your designs, to make sure there isn’t a separate registration that is still live and active. Some marks have multiple registrations!)
AN HOUR AND A SHOWER
BEEN BROKE BEFORE
BREATHE LIKE A FISH
COWBOY SPRING BREAK
GOTTA KILL IT TO GRILL IT
I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS ____________ – Underline was part of the mark.
I’M A BREASTFEEDING KIND OF MAMA
KEEP THE PEACE
LEVEL THE DEVIL
LIVE LIFE EXHAUSTED
LIVE LIKE A LOST BOY
QUEEN OF HARTS
RAW & DIRTY
SURF A.M. / GOLF P.M.
SURF YOUR ASS OFF!
THE GLASS IS ALWAYS 11/10THS FULL!
THE SNUGGLE IS REAL * [Removed from spreadsheet]
YOUR VIBE ATTRACTS YOUR TRIBE. * [Removed from spreadsheet]
PART 1-B: FASCINATING SPECIMENS
Here’s a type of specimen I feel like I’m seeing a lot lately: a phrase shown in an ornamental way on a shirt, mug, or other object … included in a screenshot that shows the actual brand name being something completely different! This is the specimen for EAT PLANTS B*TCH, but the web address and logo for the site are both SLUTTY VEGAN. This company has three registered trademarks for their SLUTTY VEGAN brand name, with four more applications in process. But they also have 26 more registered marks or applications, which seems … maybe a bit excessive.
Note: This is a curated list, and may not include all marks that affect you or your business. All opinions expressed in the snark are my own.
As always, the new marks have been added to my ginormous spreadsheet; please check it out for a shockingly large list of registered trademarks!