MISSY MEYER’S SNARKY MUSINGS ABOUT TRADEMARKS, COPYRIGHT, LICENSING, AND OTHER IP MATTERS!

Brand New Trademark Applications: 10 May – 16 May 2026

DON’T PANIC! This is a list of brand new applications for trademarks, NOT a list of marks that have been fully registered. For all of the marks on this list, an application was sent to the USPTO, and a serial number was automatically assigned. These won’t be seen by human eyes for about 6 months, and many will be rejected or abandoned.

I’ve made bold the ones that seem either really egregious or are commonly used all over.

[Go straight to your preferred class: 004, 009, 014, 016, 021, 025, 028]

 


Class 004: Fuels, Oils, and Illuminants

Includes: candles, tea lights, wax melts, potpourri wax, personal lubricants, and lots of types of fuels and oils.

99824282AMERICAN YARD
99824761BEYOND CANDLE STORE
99814975HEARTH & HOME
99816268LEI IN A BOTTLE
99826300MOOD AND FLAME
99821164MY NEIGHBOR’S
99825464OZARK TRAIL
99818459SUNWASHED LINEN
99821612TIMBERLIGHT
99814012UMBER
99819247UNNAMED

 


Class 009: Electrical Apparatus & Digital Products

Includes: digital designs, downloadable images, computer fonts, media players, phone cases, fridge magnets, and a whole lot more.
[Filtered to results that include the words graphic, design, image, font, magnet, or phone cases in the list of goods.]

99823457AFRICAN NFT MARKET
99815000BASIC INTELLIGENCE
99815296CREEPY JAR
99815954DESIGN ESSENTIALS
99819027FORGE
99816348INTELLIGENCE
99821152LIL DOOKIE
99823173MY TYPE ON PAPER
99822515PLAYFULSPACES
99826661SKI GUY
99823580SLICE
99820657SURELY TOGETHER
99816391THINK FOR YOURSELF
99817434TREASURE TROVE
99826913WAFFLE
99825622WE BUY NUDES     – Gross.

 


Class 014: Jewelry

Includes: jewelry (rings, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, etc.), key chains, clocks and watches (except smartwatches), cuff links, jewelry boxes, and more.

99816872BIG PRINCESS
99815815BRILLIANCE WITHOUT BOUNDARIES
99824179EGO ACCESSORIES
99819157FIDGIKEYS
99827261FIRST HAND
99818001HAMMER
99824850HAMMERED IN THE MOUNTAINS
99820545HEIRLOOM SIGNET
99814847HYPOTHESIS
99827391I AM MY MOTHER’S DAUGHTER
99818538OLD WHITE MAN
99816880PRINCESS BABY
99817434TREASURE TROVE
99821731TWINKLE EYE
99816462WEIRDO THINGS

 


Class 016: Paper Goods & Printed Matter

Includes: greeting cards, pens, books, planners, journals, envelopes, decals and stickers, bags for packaging, gift wrap, art supplies, and more.

99826486“IT AIN’T PLASTIC”
99820894A LINE ART
99814565A WARM HUG FOR YOUR HEART
99823786ART GEM CRATE
99823049BEAUTIFULLY AWKWARD
99822576BLESSINGS OF FAITH
99817286BRILLIANT IDEAS I HAD
99821763BUILD THE DAMN THING
99822571CALM FIRST
99815460CHARACTER BUILDERS
99823605CONVERSATIONS FROM THE CLASSROOM
99815954DESIGN ESSENTIALS
99820010FEELINGS IN THE AIR
99816995GAME DAY GNOME     – Good gravy, are the gnomes still a thing?
99818012HAMMER
99827391I AM MY MOTHER’S DAUGHTER
99819389I’M ON A JOY-RIDE WITH JESUS!!! BECAUSE HE TOOK THE DEVIL’S KEYS!!!
99824319INTERPLANETARY HELP DESK
99826624JUST KEEP GOING
99827354LET’S TALK ABOUT IT
99823567MAIL-A-PUZZLE     – Goods: Printed greeting cards featuring a puzzle.
99818779MY LIFE’S NEXT CHAPTER
99816209OPEN FOR BUSINESS
99821588PATHFINDER
99823420POST-A-PUZZLE     – Same goods as MAIL-A-PUZZLE.
99825793POTTERS WHEEL     – Goods list does not include potter’s wheels.
99822976PRAY IT FORWARD
99820226SHIT IN BOTH HANDS
99818810STAY WILD
99825928THE BIG DAY CALENDAR
99818286TINY GRANDMA
99822722TRANSFORMATIVE CREATIVITY

 


Class 021: Housewares & Glass

Includes: drinking glasses, cups, mugs, insulated flasks, tumblers, cookware, pots & pans, cutting boards, oven mitts, and more.

99824868A DAY OF US
99818136AGAVE FLASK
99817529BAD ASS GLASS
99821218BAYOU BOOTLEG
99824479BEVERAGE BETTER
99818187CHILLPROOF TO GO
99815263CLEAN N BAKE
99816190CUDDLE CUP
99823362DEMOCRAT STRONG
99824820GRIPCLIP
99813954HERE FOR A GOOD TIME, NOT A LONG TIME
99822953I SERVE A POWERFUL AND ALMIGHTY GOD
99824319INTERPLANETARY HELP DESK
99816267IT’S A UTICA THING!
99816816JUST GET TO THE TRAILHEAD
99823173MY TYPE ON PAPER
99819943PET PRO GROOMING
99820220POCKET BRUSH     – Goods: toothbrushes; oral care kits.
99822976PRAY IT FORWARD
99824624RED RICE
99816521UNEXPECTED MEAL
99819247UNNAMED
99823241YOUR FINE!     [sic]

 


Class 025: Clothing

Includes: shirts, sweatshirts, baby bodysuits, cloth bibs, undergarments, aprons, shoes & socks, and so much more.

99820627419
99825712“I PLAY CARDS AND I KNOW THINGS”
99815488AFTER HOURS RUN CLUB
99814262AMERICAN MATRIARCHY
99813352ANGRY CAPTAIN
99814286BALL MODE
99822398BOOKED, BLONDE & BUSY
99814945BORN SALTY
99815668CAPE     – Goods list does not include actual capes.
99815267CHIPS
99822902CUT IT WITH KALE
99818648DEAR MOM, I’LL BE RICH SOON
99816238DEATH BEFORE POP COUNTRY
99822148DON’T PULL A HAMMY!
99825841EMOTIONAL DAMAGE
99819062FAITH FUELED
99827138FAVORITE SON
99824212FEAR NO GOD
99823650FIRST WE SURF
99816516FLUFFY
99824865FUCK EVERYBODY
99816995GAME DAY GNOME
99822846GET IT DONE
99818233GO GET HER
99827428GOD OVER EVERYTHING
99826209GOD, FAMILY, COUNTRY OUTDOORS
99825879GOLF DADDY
99820238GOLF LIFE
99824685GULF GURL
99827364HOMESICK
99815930HOT MOMS DO BARRE
99820512I DON’T ASK QUESTIONS, I JUST FIND ANSWERS
99820415I NEED A JOB
99826377I WAS MADE FOR THIS
99816267IT’S A UTICA THING!
99814056JAZZ AIN’T DEAD
99816816JUST GET TO THE TRAILHEAD
99816635JUST PERFECT
99816514JUST WANNA BE ME
99826816LIFE’S AN ADVENTURE. GETOUT
99822103LIL ANGLERS
99821152LIL DOOKIE
99820360LITTLE COCONUTS
99819412LITTLE WHILE
99821822LIVE LIFE WORTHY
99821853LIVE OUTSIDE YOUR SHELL
99816056LOCAL CAR GIRLY
99824067MADE FOR THIS
99817024MONEY NEVER SLEEPS
99816195MY ASS IS OUT.
99823173MY TYPE ON PAPER
99814248NO APOLOGIEZ
99825853NO CLUCKS GIVEN
99818824NUT HUGGERS     – Goods: underwear.
99818866PARIS IS FOR LOSERS
99818319PEACE BE UPON YOU
99826360PERSONAL VIBE RATER
99826872PLEASURE BEFORE BUSINESS
99822976PRAY IT FORWARD
99825516PRAY UNTIL IT BREAKS
99825320ROOTED IN HAWAII
99827210SALTWATER INSIDER
99823293SCOOP LIFE
99817583SIMPLE
99826661SKI GUY
99822637SKINT
99823580SLICE
99825816STILL KING
99823665TAKE YOUR TOP OFF
99820079TATTOOS & TANLINES
99818286TINY GRANDMA
99827400TODAY I WILL BE THE BEST VERSION OF ME!
99821300TRASH PANDA
99818596W.O.M.A.N
99819238Y’ALLTERNATIVE
99823241YOUR FINE!     [sic]

And our old friends at Ghost Global LLC have submitted over a dozen new applications. No specimens yet, but odds are they’ll all be plain black text on a plain white t-shirt with a $49.99 price tag!

99827306#1 GOY
99827321BEST GOY
99826825BORED BOSSY BITCH
99826883CRYPTO CHRISTIAN
99827356E=MC SQUARED BITCHES
99827342EUREKA BITCHES
99826765GOD IS MY TWIN
99827314GOD’S FAVORITE GOY
99826848I BROKE BANKING
99826944IT’S NOT LEGACY IT’S DYNASTY
99826719JESUS IS MY TWIN
99826803LUCIFER IS MY TWIN
99827349MONEY MATRIX
99826785SATAN IS MY TWIN
99826905WE CAN ALWAYS LIVE IN THE PAST OR BE PRESENT IN THE FUTURE

 


Class 028: Toys & Games

Includes: toys, games, dolls & plush, party hats, pet toys, sports equipment, Christmas tree decorations, and more.
[Filtered to results that include the words Christmas, toy, plush, doll, puzzle, party, balloon, garland, bath, dough, or ornament in the list of goods.]

99824868A DAY OF US
99814335BEYOND TOYS
99817213BOB BEAR
99820082BUT DID YOU DIE     – A very appropriate brand name for [checks specimen] …a crochet turtle.
99816166CHICKEN POT PIE
99813844CLIPTOYS
99825841EMOTIONAL DAMAGE     – Not sure if it’s related to the meme.
99818096GOLD MEDAL HOCKEY
99818665HERO EAGLE
99814096LET’S TACO ‘BOUT     – Different applicant than BUT DID YOU DIE (though also from China), also for crochet dolls!
99820881MAGICAL MATES
99824634MAKE A PET
99816010MAKE PLAY HAPPEN
99821397MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMAL     – Goods: Christmas tree ornaments.
99816335MY BOOK BOX BUDDY
99823173MY TYPE ON PAPER
99817592MYSTERY SQUISHY DUMPLING
99818538OLD WHITE MAN
99824053PLAYMUG
99814900RAWR MEANS I LOVE YOU
99819646SENDING YOU A BIG HUG
99825240STAY POSITIVE
99815071TEXTURED WORRY STONE
99818286TINY GRANDMA
99819482TO MY DAUGHTER     – Applicant is a company in China for all these “to my” marks.
99819455TO MY GRANDMA
99819428TO MY GRANDPA
99819912TO MY HUSBAND
99817372TO MY MOM
99817371TO MY SISTER
99819915TO MY SON
99819415TO MY WIFE
99821300TRASH PANDA

 



[sic] = A spelling, spacing, grammar, or punctuation error is part of the mark, not a typo from my butterfingers.

 


Note: This is a curated list, and may not include all marks that affect you or your business. All marks in this list are Drawing Code 4, meaning they are plain text without any required style, color, or font. All opinions expressed in the snark are my own. All snark is intended for entertainment purposes.

If one of these applied-for marks affects your business or brand, it’s never too early to file a Letter of Protest! You’ll need to create a MyUSPTO account to submit an LoP. It’s a handy account; you can also keep a list of applications of interest, and get an email any time there’s activity on that application!

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