MISSY MEYER’S SNARKY MUSINGS ABOUT TRADEMARKS, COPYRIGHT, LICENSING, AND OTHER IP MATTERS!

Trademark Tuesday / Newly Registered Trademarks / 21 July – 27 July 2026

Note: The marks in part 1 are now fully registered and active! This list is compiled from the USPTO Trademark Search system. Some of these are legitimate brand names! I’ve included them on this list because those brand names are also words or phrases that may be used on the goods in question by crafters and makers.

 


PART 1: NEW REGISTRATIONS

[Go straight to your preferred class: 004, 009, 014, 016, 021, 025, 028]

 


Everybody’s Favorite Class, 025: Clothing

Includes: shirts, sweatshirts, baby bodysuits, cloth bibs, undergarments, aprons, shoes & socks, and so much more.

90794894ACQUITTEDMy “acquitted” shirt has people asking questions already answered by the shirt.
99369635ALWAYS FRIDAYAh, but if every day were Friday, we wouldn’t appreciate Friday as much.
98965743BACK TO THE FUTUREBut you weren’t using this anyway, RIGHT?
98146910BEACH SLOTHI’m not a huge fan of the beach. [Insert Anakin’s speech about sand]
99577730BEAGLESYou can, of course, still use this common dog breed name.
98784684BECAAAUUUSSSEYou can, of course, still use the common word “because”.
98715433CALM DOWNNever in the history of calm down has “calm down” calmed anyone down.
99496598CASH AND CARRY
98711181DAMN I LOVE AMERICAI … can’t quite say this, in these troubling times.
99055766DAYCAREYou can, of course, still use this common word in a phrase.
98849822EAT A FUCKING CARBAt first I misread this as “crab” … either way, yes!
97355990EAT YOUR GREENSExcept right now, I’d avoid the lettuce.
99063761EVERYTHING GOOD[supplemental]
98850122FAHRVERGNUGENOwner is some guy in Virginia, not Volkswagen.
99390051GET YOUR ASS OUT THE WHITE HOUSEYes.
98870533GIRLS LIKE HORRORThey’re “shattering myths,” but whenever I hear about horror movies, it’s always women talking about them!
98941394GO ASK YOUR MOTHERSIt’s a podcast. Good for them for keeping under 30 minutes.
99182655HOT MESS TO HOT MOMI bet she’s still a hot mess, tho.
98564128HUGGABLEI would never, ever, EVER wear this shirt. Huggers, ugh!
99500428I AM BIRDThis and the next are mobile phone games…
99500388I AM MONKEY…where reviews say you are “bombarded by ads”.
98813799I DIDN’T COME TO BUNTI came to totally whiff.
99562587I DIDN’T ASK FOR YOUR SWING TIPS[supplemental] A middle-aged leisure golfer would absolutely ignore this shirt on a women of any age. Even if she’s a pro golfer.
98707176I LOVE MY JESUS I GIVE HIM HUGS & SQUEEZESAre they meaning to rhyme “Jesus” with “squeezes” here?
98029687KEEP IT POSITIVE SWEETIEUgh, please don’t call people “sweetie,” it feels so patronizing. (Though at least they didn’t spell it “sweaty” like some do.)
99061075LOVER OF THE GAMESpecimens have basketballs and gridiron footballs, so I guess it’s not a specific game.
98719483MAKE AMERICA BOOM AGAINOK, boomer.
99383348MEWUnrelated to Pokémon, this is a memecoin thing.
99563197OF COURSE IT’S GOOD I MADE ITThat’s right, have pride in the things you make!
98256198P.S. LOVE GOD
99210712PAW LIFEDescribes our house — we live in service to our cats.
97484918POLITE SOCIETYOh, if only we could have such a thing!
97809918READ, BREATHE & RELEASEIt doesn’t have the catchiness of “live laugh love,” but it’s OK.
97447242SHINE ON
98488611SHITTY FRIENDSApparently, rodeo folks in eastern Washington are … shitty friends?
98424321SO RUDEYep, don’t mind if I am!
99583715SUNDAY WAFFLESAs opposed to ALWAYS FRIDAY, every day is a good day for sunday waffles.
99449697SWORN TO PROTECTNothing like putting David into tactical gear.
98901085VALUE YOUR LIGHTTalking about “my light” feels so froo-froo woo-woo.
99393747WINNERS NEVER QUITI mean, I bet even winners know when it’s prudent to quit.

 


Class 004: Fuels, Oils, and Illuminants

Includes: candles, tea lights, wax melts, potpourri wax, personal lubricants, and lots of types of fuels and oils.

99336474BANG BUTTER
99584226BIRDBATH
98307120IN GOOD ENERGY
99303346MACHO
79431398NO COMMENT
99022235SURE SHOT
79431400TO BE CONFIRMED
98816128WECANDLE
99575943WHERE STILLNESS LIVES

 


Class 009: Electrical Apparatus & Digital Products

Includes: digital designs, downloadable images, computer fonts, media players, phone cases, fridge magnets, and a whole lot more.
[Filtered to results that include the words graphic, design, image, font, magnet, or phone cases in the list of goods.]

98309065BLACK DIAMOND
99435390LIFE UNLOCKED
99352690MEMORY MAGNETS CO
79403307OFF THE DECK
99369757PARTYBOI
98075436SMARTCUSTOMER

 


Class 014: Jewelry

Includes: jewelry (rings, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, etc.), key chains, clocks and watches (except smartwatches), cuff links, jewelry boxes, and more.

98804961ACHIEVE IMPOSSIBLE
97777311DIAMOND MEMORIES
99466626GOLD CLUB
98029687KEEP IT POSITIVE SWEETIE
97428550LIL BOSS DOLL
98894327ROMANCE WITH A SECRET
99552778SHARED STARS
98642162SHINE BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOND
99047628SHINE WITH PURPOSE
99585861SPIKY
99580423STARRY NIGHT
98641558THE FUTURE IS NOW

 


Class 016: Paper Goods & Printed Matter

Includes: greeting cards, pens, books, planners, journals, envelopes, decals and stickers, bags for packaging, gift wrap, art supplies, and more.

98146910BEACH SLOTH
98309065BLACK DIAMOND
98686743BRAIN BUDS
99674723C IS FOR CTHULHU
98606481CHRISTMASLAND
99396581DON’T TALK TO ME, I’M COLORING
99622634EPOXY PRO KIT     [supplemental]
98870533GIRLS LIKE HORROR
98933731INTERNATIONAL ELECTRICAL CODE
98029687KEEP IT POSITIVE SWEETIE
99565733MAIL BUDZ
99414708MAYOR’S DESK
99022919MEDITATE LIKE A GODDESS
99441662MOON CHEESE
98895217OWN YOUR LANE
99210712PAW LIFE
99024308PLAN AND PROSE     [supplemental]
99577854PROUDGIRL
97809918READ, BREATHE & RELEASE
99551944ROCK BUDDIES
99500719STEP
99622527SUPER GLUE PRO KIT     [supplemental]
99583379WRITE THIS WAY
98916010YEARS ALIVE
99579542YOU ARE MY ROCK

 


Class 021: Housewares & Glass

Includes: drinking glasses, cups, mugs, insulated flasks, tumblers, cookware, pots & pans, cutting boards, oven mitts, and more.

98488490ABOVE THE SUN
98146910BEACH SLOTH
99586770BREEZE SIP
98728207BRIGHT CRYSTAL
98314849CAMP COZY
99575116CULT MUGS
99392912DRINK PLANTS BABE
99279804FUN HAS NO OFF SEASON
97695677HAND STRAP
99565885HUMIDIFIER     – Goods are just drinking glasses.
99053469HYDRA STEEL DRINKWARE
98029687KEEP IT POSITIVE SWEETIE
99595322LANDLORD APPROVED
99202106LIQUID ELEMENTS
99061075LOVER OF THE GAME
97814013MAKE BANK
99238025MODERN AMERICAN VINTAGE
97777330NO FILTER NEEDED
99466219PUP DIVA
97809918READ, BREATHE & RELEASE
99581860SMASH N GRAB
99581583STAY DANGEROUS
98909909STEP UP YOUR WINE GAME
99583715SUNDAY WAFFLES
99341057THE CHILLR
98953410TRANQUIL GARDEN
98978395WELLSPRING

 


Class 028: Toys & Games

Includes: toys, games, dolls & plush, party hats, pet toys, sports equipment, Christmas tree decorations, and more.
[Filtered to results that include the words Christmas, toy, plush, doll, puzzle, party, balloon, garland, bath, dough, or ornament in the list of goods.]

99213103DADCARVED
98919971EMOTIONAL POSITIVE
99158251HAUNTED TOSS
99500428I AM BIRD
99500350I AM CLEANER
99500388I AM MONKEY
99313920LET THAT SHIT GO
99065361LOCKED-IN
98917069MAGIC EVERY SEASON
99209494MAGICDEALER
99125874MAJESTIC PALS
99572549MUSHROOM BEAR
99585550OH LOOK…IT’S ON FIRE     – Goods include Christmas tree decorations. (??!?!?!)
99096977PLAY IT FORWARD
98908431POSITIVE AVOCADO
99588223POSITIVE FIRE
99146448POSITIVE LLAMA
98947173POSITIVE PUG
99266591SQUISHYBALL     [supplemental]
98826299WE MAKE PUZZLES. YOU MAKE MEMORIES.

 



PART 2: CANCELLED MARKS IN CLASS 025

(Standard disclaimer: Always double-check these words and phrases before using them in your designs, to make sure there isn’t a separate registration that is still live and active. Some marks have multiple registrations!)

78550999AGAINST THE GRAIN
86656134ALWAYS BE
88494255ART OVER WAR
88262353BASIC BITCH
75063344BEAR
78976514BEER GEEK
88487278BOLDLY PROCLAIM YOUR PRIDE
86648459BOOBALICIOUS
76305681CROWN OF HEARTS
88034685DOUBLE DRIBBLE
87140798FOR BULLDOGS USE ONLY
88008663FREE MY BABY DADDIE
88487939GNOME GROWN     *[removed from spreadsheet]
87206144I AM GENIUS IN MOTION
86841979IS NOT ENOUGH
88586313JESUS GIRL
87042258LITTLE GALS RULE
87025332LITTLE GUYS RULE
87096667LITTLE KIDS RULE
88472380LOOK AT SHE
88506253LOOKIN’ FOR A FIGHT
97646577MAGA RATS     *[removed from spreadsheet]
88306742MAKE AMERICA UNIFIED AGAIN
88306629MAKE AMERICA UNITED AGAIN
88047916MAKE MY GOLF GAME GREAT AGAIN     *[removed from spreadsheet]
86574160MERMAID LIFE     *[removed from spreadsheet]
88129140OH OK…
87837365ON CABO TIME
88486789PEACE OF MINE
88195631PEACE, LOVE, BACON & MORE BACON
87607414PROUD     *[removed from spreadsheet]
88448377RAISE THE DEAD
87858127SALT NECK
88502103THANK YOU FOR NOT BEING EVIL
88199210WEAR WHAT YOU BELIEVE
88949302WICKED COOL
88414561YOUNG CEO

 



[sic] = A spelling, spacing, grammar, or punctuation error is part of the mark, not a typo from my butterfingers.
[removed from spreadsheet] = The cancelled item was on my spreadsheet of marks, and has now been removed.

 


Note: This is a curated list, and may not include all marks that affect you or your business. All opinions expressed in the snark are my own. All snark is intended for entertainment purposes.

As always, the new marks have been added to my ginormous spreadsheet; please check it out for a shockingly large list of registered trademarks!

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