MISSY MEYER’S SNARKY MUSINGS ABOUT TRADEMARKS, COPYRIGHT, LICENSING, AND OTHER IP MATTERS!

Trademark Tuesday / Newly Registered Trademarks / 4 Aug – 10 Aug 2026

Note: The marks in part 1 are now fully registered and active! This list is compiled from the USPTO Trademark Search system. Some of these are legitimate brand names! I’ve included them on this list because those brand names are also words or phrases that may be used on the goods in question by crafters and makers.

 


PART 1: NEW REGISTRATIONS

[Go straight to your preferred class: 004, 009, 014, 016, 021, 025, 028]

 


Everybody’s Favorite Class, 025: Clothing

Includes: shirts, sweatshirts, baby bodysuits, cloth bibs, undergarments, aprons, shoes & socks, and so much more.

993345521ST TEAM ALL-BROHow is it that “bro” has become such an awful concept in the last 5 years or so?
98597968BAD DADMaaaaaybe this isn’t something you want to advertise?
98688793BE A GREAT HUMANDon’t mind if I do.
98893119BERRY PINKA lot of the specimens say “Berry Pink Los Angeles” but the owner is in Hong Kong.
98235293BIG SHRED ENERGYUnclear if we’re shredding waves or cheese or what.
99459296BIRD NERD[supplemental]  I can’t get into bird watching, I know I’d become obsessed.
99608393CAN WE SMOKE IN HERE?Would anyone ever ask this? Isn’t smoking indoors pretty much a no-go everywhere these days?
98883312COME GET THESE KIDS!
98907642CURDS & WHEYBoth are gross, and yet cheese is magical.
98978598DESIGNED BY DADS[insert sexist joke about product quality here]
98191297DON’T HATE MASTURBATEFeels like there should be a comma after HATE.
99606879EARN THE COFFEEIf you like coffee, go have coffee. You don’t have to earn it.
99593604EXPLORING WITH PURPOSE
99603795FAITH HAS RECEIPTS I’M PROOFReceipts stating what? Goodness? Badness? Being overcharged?
98520368GET TACOSDon’t mind if I do.
99606530GIRLS OF SUMMERNot even looking at the specimens, I’m sure by GIRLS they mean full-grown women.
99606912GOD GOT USGot us what?  Tacos?
99356165GOD PROBLEMS
99599932GOD’S VERY OWNVery own what?  Taco shop?
99799200HAVE A HIPPIE DAY[supplemental]
99607906HIGH OFF MY HUSTLEUgh, don’t get me started again on hustle culture.
98438905HUG A DEMOCRATThey could use it these days.
99611273I AM HIS-STORY
99100235I DON’T NEED A REASON TO WINEHave you tried Portuguese green wine (vinho verde)?  Excellent!
99372052I LOVE SURPRISESNOPE NOPE NO THANK YOU
98975456ICE CREAM SCIENTISTOh my gosh, this sounds like the best job ever.
98860417I’M LEGALBecause the best merch is just plain text in Arial.
97824819LET ME MANSPLAIN THATThe brand is “Mandacity“. Amusing, but in an infuriating way, y’know?
99227314MAKE AMERICA MACHO AGAINInsert the standard question: Was it ever?
99606597MAKE EARTH EDEN AGAINInsert the standard question: Was it ever?
90825802MINI BOSS IN THE MAKINGYa gotta love a specimen with an AI image Photoshopped onto a mockup.
99407722NNF NEVER NOT FISHINGNo time to sleep, no time to eat. Must always fish.
99407727NNH NEVER NOT HUNTINGSamesies.
98668755PEOPLE WILL BE PEOPLE BUT GOD WILL BE GODThis feels about as convoluted and nonsensical as something from Ghost Global.
99699169PRAY HUSTLE SLAYPass, pass, pass.  Well … hmm. I could maybe be convinced to slay a little.
99598510REAL BOSSES WEAR CROSSESThis thing looks like a sword with a bow on it, not a cross. On an AI model mockup.
97607632SAY LESS READ MOREDon’t mind if I do!  [Cracks open Dungeon Crawler Carl book 8]
98698585SPREAD LOVE NOT JUDGEMENTEh, I’m kind of on the side of being judgy.
98152738STUDY LIKE A SCHOLAR PLAY LIKE A WARRIOR THINK LIKE A CHAMPIONIRON ON YOUR BRANDING LIKE A FUMBLE-FINGERED NINNY
97155168THE BIBLE BELTIt’s a belt with bible books printed on it.  In Papyrus font!
98232875THERE’S NO PLACE LIKENo additional word after the mark on the specimens, but those products are no longer available at their site.
99506839WALK SLOW SMILE MORESmiling at people while walking in public is such a USA thing.
98813815WE DIDN’T COME TO BUNTThe phrase is baseball-ish, but the specimens all have a fish holding a surfboard.
99035957WE LIVE FOR SATURDAYS

 


Class 004: Fuels, Oils, and Illuminants

Includes: candles, tea lights, wax melts, potpourri wax, personal lubricants, and lots of types of fuels and oils.

99030116BLUE TIDE
99570851CANDLE PEARLS
99034122CONNECTION CANDLES
98027341COZY CASHMERE
98887609HERD TALLOW
99227142KICK ASH
99246944MODERN HEIRLOOM
99321047NOIR WOODS
79434450SPELLING
99051002THE SCENT OF YOUR BEST SELF
97410703TIL FOREVER
99475505WARMTH & WICK

 


Class 009: Electrical Apparatus & Digital Products

Includes: digital designs, downloadable images, computer fonts, media players, phone cases, fridge magnets, and a whole lot more.
[Filtered to results that include the words graphic, design, image, font, magnet, or phone cases in the list of goods.]

794470431-2-SWITCH
9844062486 HARASSMENT
97063114ALBERT EINSTEIN
98756962AMALGAMATION AI
99050494BIG HEAVY COVER PRODUCTS
98686285BIT PART
97655269DIAMOND
98860417I’M LEGAL
99544500MAD MAGS
98609023MADE
99123643REMIX
98312447TRAVEL WITH LIFE

 


Class 014: Jewelry

Includes: jewelry (rings, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, etc.), key chains, clocks and watches (except smartwatches), cuff links, jewelry boxes, and more.

984315451220
993006023D HUGGIE HOOPS     [supplemental]
98893119BERRY PINK
98912123COMING TO LIFE
99487463EASYBUILDPLANS
97981327HAUTE HIPPIE STYLE
99705290I HATE EVERYONE BUT US
99125920INTUITION EYE     [supplemental]
79408840LOFI BOY
90384381LOVE LIVE LIFE
79433545LOVE UNLIMITED
99325077METALMARK     [supplemental]
99564995MYSTIC TOUCH
99180313PICKLE MONSTERS
98935904PRETTY GIRL SWAG
98938006SHIFT
99591094TINY MESS FRIENDS
99560948TUX CLUB
99607205YOUR STORY, SET IN STONE.

 


Class 016: Paper Goods & Printed Matter

Includes: greeting cards, pens, books, planners, journals, envelopes, decals and stickers, bags for packaging, gift wrap, art supplies, and more.

9789462595 PERCENT GROUP
99539984A BEAUTIFUL YEAR WITH JESUS
98561640ACTIVATE YOUR YES
99363615ADVENTURE MASTER
98472169AS IT IS
99107132ASCEND
99250678ATELIER BOX     [supplemental]
99166503BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE SO MUCH S#!T TO DEAL WITH
98893119BERRY PINK
98193074BLACK OR WHITE IT’S HUMAN LIFE!
99607194BOARDROOM
99400625BOARDWALK
98924480CUPID MEETS CRIME SCENE
98978598DESIGNED BY DADS
97655269DIAMOND
98191297DON’T HATE MASTURBATE
99091808EMBRACE LUMINOUS VIBES
99142639ENDLESSLY CHERISHED
98193308EXTENDED PLAY
99271660FOLLOW YOUR NORTH STAR
99199215FORMERLY KNOWN AS CARDS
99353787HAPPY ABUNDANCE OF JOY
99705290I HATE EVERYONE BUT US
97981200I KNOW A GUY
98401006IT’S LITTLE THINGS
98814501JOURNALIST’S TOOLBOX
79408840LOFI BOY
97735317LUV THE NUB     [supplemental]
98484986MAX
97636702MAX
99590922MINDFUL LEADER     [supplemental]
98648696MOM ERA
98871471PASSION FOR GOD’S WORD. COMPASSION FOR GOD’S CHOSEN PEOPLE.
99571368PAWSITIVE VIBES
98881433POOP BAGS FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T LIKE POOP
99506770PROTECTOR’S PRAYER     [supplemental]
99602926ROOTED IN WONDER
98290796TEN MINUTES WITH GOD
98402660THE CLOSER’S NOTEBOOK
99596939TINY BAKER
97894227WRITEFUL MIND

 


Class 021: Housewares & Glass

Includes: drinking glasses, cups, mugs, insulated flasks, tumblers, cookware, pots & pans, cutting boards, oven mitts, and more.

98960919ARTISAN ELITE
99012859BEAT YOUR MEAT
99090177CLEAR SAVINGS
98122560CORE
98978598DESIGNED BY DADS
98688890DIVORCERAMICS
99091808EMBRACE LUMINOUS VIBES
90552197HAT STACKERS
97817777HOLISTIC HUSTLER
97697927I KNOW A GUY
98978491IT GIRL COCKTAILS
99091489KIND REBEL
99451703LADDER-FREE SOLUTIONS     [supplemental]
97824819LET ME MANSPLAIN THAT
79408840LOFI BOY
98909715MAKE COFFEE GREAT AGAIN
98827459MAKING HYDRATION FUN
99250033MONOGRAM
99441792MYTHICAL
98730568SIMPLY SORTED
98743014WOODPECKER

 


Class 028: Toys & Games

Includes: toys, games, dolls & plush, party hats, pet toys, sports equipment, Christmas tree decorations, and more.
[Filtered to results that include the words Christmas, toy, plush, doll, puzzle, party, balloon, garland, bath, dough, or ornament in the list of goods.]

99363615ADVENTURE MASTER
97080383ALEX
99251631BITTY CHOMPERS
98374844CALMINGBUDDY
98867659CO-OWNED BY DOGS
97655269DIAMOND
98193308EXTENDED PLAY
79435505HIPPOPOCKETMUS
79408840LOFI BOY
79437337LOVE TO MOVE LIFE
99015356MAGNETIC MATCH RINGS
99015140MIX OR MATCH VEHICLES
99460984MOVIE SUPERSTARS     [supplemental]
99351397POCKET POTUS
98933014SKYDIVE
99008464SNUGGLEVERSE
98867398STACK-A PUZZLE
99398746STAR BAKER
98774270UNICORN PAL
98833823YOU SNOOZE YOU BOOZE

 



PART 2: CANCELLED MARKS IN CLASS 025

(Standard disclaimer: Always double-check these words and phrases before using them in your designs, to make sure there isn’t a separate registration that is still live and active. Some marks have multiple registrations!)

74372288AMERICAN QUEEN
88189842ARTFULLY DESIGNED FOOTWEAR AND HANDBAGS
88458893BLESS CHILDREN
88406731DON’T THINK, JUST DO
88314395DREAM PURPOSEFULLY
79256240FULL ADDICT
88451385GOOD LUCK UNDIES
88539191I PROMISE TO FOLLOW JESUS
86473273IT’S NEXT YEAR
87861055LETS ALL WIN      [sic]
88412968MISANTHROPE
86329017NEIGHBORHOOD HOPE DEALER
88373247NOT JUST FOR BLONDES
87911944PALLET LIFE
88450249PROTECT YOUR LIGHT
78533448REAL WOMEN WEAR RED
88364413SALTWATER RANCH
88204410SCHOOL GIRLS ROCK
86643707STAY LAZY
78531478TATTOO YOUR SOUL
88456170THE PARTY NEVER ENDS
88178580TITS FIRST
87141519TRIPLE A+
87208558WIFEY     *[removed from spreadsheet]

 



[sic] = A spelling, spacing, grammar, or punctuation error is part of the mark, not a typo from my butterfingers.
[removed from spreadsheet] = The cancelled item was on my spreadsheet of marks, and has now been removed.

 


Note: This is a curated list, and may not include all marks that affect you or your business. All opinions expressed in the snark are my own. All snark is intended for entertainment purposes.

As always, the new marks have been added to my ginormous spreadsheet; please check it out for a shockingly large list of registered trademarks!

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